I wish this weren't so but
Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D .
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my lawn. As I turn on the hose inthe driveway, I look over at my car and decide my car needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice that there ismail on the porch table that I brought up from themail box earlier. I decide to go through the mailbefore I wash the car.I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junkmail in the garbage can under the table, and noticethat the can is full, so, I decide to put the billsback on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near themailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may aswell pay the bills first.I take my check book off the table, and see thatthere is only one check left.My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I goinside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need topush the Coke aside so that I don't accidentallyknock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm,and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator tokeep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke a vase offlowers on the counter catches my eye. They need tobe watered.I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discovermy reading glasses that I've been searching for allmorning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, butfirst I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill acontainer with water and suddenly I spot the TVremote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, Iwill be looking for the remote, but I won't rememberthat it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to putit back in the living room where it belongs, butfirst I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit ofit spills on the floor.So, I set the remote back down on the table, getsome towels and wipe up the spill.Then I head down the hall trying to remember what Iwas planning to do.At the end of the day:the lawn isn't watered,the car isn't washed,the bills aren't paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, the flowers don't have enough water, there is still only one check in my check book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, I don't remember what I did with the car keys, and my neighbor called to tell me he turned off the hose that was flooding the driveway. Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail. Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.
I know those of us over 40 are rolling on the floor by now and for you kids out there...
your day is coming!
GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. > GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.> LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC.
4 comments:
Ha, this is very "Grandmom".
I love it! It's sounds like my average day.
Reen - you were the first one I thought of - not Mom. I still can't get over leaving your new boss at the wrong airline and including your work performance review with Jen's invitation list to Susan.
wow - aunt maureen failed to mention those tidbits to the general populous of the family. for good reason, obviously....
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